Above all, know that the gym is a sacred place, because people that come here grant themselves a second life.

By returning to your health, you live past the end of the life, of the unhealthy you.

You extend you life, sometimes doubling it.

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Don’t wear dark workout clothes, dark means both scary and scared.

So people won’t try to ease your fear, because they will be to scared to help you.

You are going to have to pick a color, and pick colors that match.

Don’t be scared of bullies, gym is where bullies loose.

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You have the constitutional right, to bare arms, so bare them.

But make sure that there is no friction, as you skin may get irritated.

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Always have hand cream on hand, and hands, it is one of the five things you need.

Keys(1), headphone mp3 player(2), gloves(3), hand cream(4), and a bandanna on your wrist(5).

The bandanna is for wiping sweat, so that it does not get in your eyes.

Otherwise all you have is paper towels, and your shirt.

And whether you are large, or have a six pack – don’t show it.

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And you also want to get dressed, or at least wear some pants... you wildcat… rrrrr

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It is of some note, that that when sweat dries, as you rest or go the the restroom.

It seems like small crystals may form, or something like that, and scratch you up, hand cream fixes that.

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You can’t wear long pants, I struggle with this to this day.

I look like that purple guy from ACDC, and I hate it.

But, a workout is non stop, and you are always moving.

Long pants will get wet and heavy, from sweat, just go short.

Do not throw them out once they tear, you have to fix them with thread and needle a few times.

Same goes for gloves, you have to repair them.

Everything is always tearing up, it gets expensive.

You also want to save all the torn up things, just to show people all the shoes, and gloves and pants.

That you wore down to nothing, I threw most of mine away, it was just too much.

30 to 50 pairs of gloves, eventually I ended up buying cheap worker gloves.

The expensive stuff is fantasy, it never lasts as long as cheap work gloves.

People who make fun of gloves, and say things like “Do they match your purse.”

Are neither working out for real, nor are they all there.

Shaming, is just a mental illness.

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You will need thick socks, and you need to monitor their elasticity.

Because once they loose it, your toenails are next, get new socks often.

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Which brings us to shoes, and feet, which are by far the most painful thing in a workout.

A real workout requires, that you move your arms and feet at the same time.

Because of time, if you use machines, or ever sit on something.

It will take you a lifetime, to reshape your body.

If you just move, workout 5 – 7 days a week, and in the end for three hours non stop.

it will take less 5 years, to transform your body.

Getting up to three hour workouts, is painless, and requires nothing.

Your endurance extends, automatically.

Use an interval timer, to eliminate your rest periods.

Speed up your music, to push your endurance, 173 bpm will do.

Dancing also means, abdominal muscles, so it is quite worth it.

I am serious about the following, this I snot a joke.

The Napoleon Dynamite dance scene is the gentles and most fluid workout I have ever seen.

You just need to add light dumbbells, and keep going up.

There is a version on the internet by a lad named Kyle, and that should show you that people will love you for it.

Alternatively, learn shuffle dancing.

If someone yells “Pay attention to me”, as an accusation, you have to learn to ignore that.

Those are not normal people, they are ill and sad.

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Finally, we get to the shoes, raised heel will kill.

You need flat shoes, with the back part as far out of your way as possible.

When dancing, a raised shoe will hit your heal, and at 173 beat per minute.

It will take less than ten days, to show you what a painful purchase that was.

While I had good experience, with an outdoor sport shoe, it was just luck.

Listen carefully, you need fabric based shoe, that will stretch a little bit.

And you probably need elastic shoelaces, to make sure everything is always snug.

The bottom of your shoe should be, leaning towards plastic.

As you are often going to face gyms, with rubber flooring.

Rubber on rubber does not slide, and hard rubber, as in pro jogging shoes, will rear up their floor.

So you need, a hard plastic surface, as that has hope to slide.

Just keep searching, large toe box, low heel, plastic bottom, flexible fabric upper.

Get some elastic shoelaces, and experiment with shoes three sizes larger.

The good news is, that fabric shoes tend to be the cheap shoe.

I saw some today for $15 dollars, so keep searching.

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Keep your music fresh, music is the only real source of energy you have.

You have to enter a dance trance, where you enchant yourself with the beat of fresh songs.

It is similar to how you zonk out, when driving home from work.

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If you ever feel like quitting or giving up, like gym is not for you.

Assemble a large collection of narrated books, and get your Triple Crown.

If gym is too hard then find your own way out of the woods, and go, go all the way, do it.

You are not less important than somebody else, you are not a cast away, you are not broken beyond repair, and you sure as hell are not a worker.

You are an adventurer, a believer in yourself, you are a force of nature, and without a doubt, you are meant to become a great being.

Life is one, and yours is sacred, live it, strong, long and healthy.